The Ramblings of an Insomniac…

Posted: September 5, 2012 in Randomness
Tags: , , , , , , ,

I am beginning a blog at the wonderfully late time of 2:30AM on the dot. I will preface it by saying, “shits about to get weird”.

I am a victim. I am suffering and there is no end in sight. I have been clapped in metaphoric chains and as much as I fight it, the wiggle room becomes taught with every tussle. The culprit? Insomnia. I have actually been good about getting some sleep seeing as how I have to wake up at a quarter to 5 every morning just to be late to work. Prior to my early morning job I had the comfort of being at ease with my insomnia as my job required me not being there until the afternoon. For someone like me who is at his most creative and his most free at the wee hours, I don’t know how I have been able to maintain outer sanity. Inner sanity has been compromised but I have an intricate and aggressive plan for keeping my inner mashed potatoes mixed in with my outer macaroni on the dinner plate of my compos mentis. I won’t go into it for fear of being ousted like a witch in Salem. Lets just say that it is a very involved process and requires the mental capacity of a dolphin that learned to walk and speak with a Scottish accent and then stumbled onto the Higgs boson based off of a bet he made to the contrary with a colleague. I see people lose their shit all the time due to insomnia and it is never a pretty site. The funniest part of someone having a breakdown is the minute or 2 after they just realized they just had a full on shit show in public. They collect whatever clothing was thrown in the ordeal and try to maintain a mean  face in the process so no one calls them out for the drama bomb that ensued. I for one have never had a breakdown. And good god have I been tested. I wear my cerebral control as a badge of honor. I look at it as a mini competition and I am seeing how many days in a row I can go without any factory accidents. So far we have a 15 year streak going. I can’t in good faith count my early teenage years as I was an emotional mess.

I am at the point now where I am counting how much sleep I could get if I fell asleep right this second and I am not liking the results so far. There is nothing that can be considered 100% normal going on at this hour. I just turned off a documentary about prostitutes on HBO. But only because I have seen it already and it just isn’t as shocking after 9th time seeing it. I don’t know what do with myself at this hour so my brother suggested I write. This is the cosmic slop that came out. Are you not entertained? So for the immediate future I will just fight making a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch (CTC as it is known in some circles), lay in perpetual discomfort, fill my blanket with unpleasant olfactory violations, and check my Facebook from my phone. I love you all and I would love to put confidence in saying good night, but I cannot. So………lates.

  1. Schemer says:

    I’m actually impressed with the slop….smells like Venus……

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