Archive for June, 2013

How would you react? Would you be glad? Would you be in the minority of people who would see the old ways of communication returned? Would you belong to the small group (in comparison to the contrary) who despise social networking and feel it cheapens human interaction? Or would you be in the vast majority of this pie chart? The ones who will (whether admittedly or not) struggle in its absence. The ones who will find it tough to convey random pontification to whomever is logged in and wading through the non-stop barrage of updates. Where do you stand on this?

Gone are the days where a phone call to a friend was how to find out the evenings plans. No longer do we as people congregate offline with the same intent as it has been replaced with seemingly low risk interactions of code in an endless sea of information. The need for instant gratification and the need to feel important has been such a need as a result of such sites as Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr. etc. A single status update that has zero influence on the droves of arbitrary “friends” would cease to exist. How would you respond? How would the shy anti social introvert be able to express his ideas from the safety of a laptop? How would the niche group of knuckle hair enthusiasts be able to find each other? Have we gone that far away from the days before social networking changed the world? It almost seems impossible to fathom not being able to connect with anyone from anywhere at anytime.

I know for me it would be tough. The amount of people I present myself to in social networking differs greatly from the people I choose to speak with personally. Going from having the world at my finger tips to being just privy to only my phones contact list would hinder such an internet self promoter like myself. As someone who benefits from exposure I find social networking to be an invaluable tool. However I have also noticed that it has also become an addiction. To have social networking disappear would be a large issue for me and countless other individuals as well as organizations that count on the reach that social networking provides. We have become so reliant on this tether to other people we don’t know that even a few days without it seems unimaginable. What would you do tomorrow if it died today?

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For a special Fathers Day edition of GTFO Friday I will be writing about something I have a seriously empathetic spot in my heart for. Something that we all have either experienced directly or indirectly. It affects people throughout their entire lives and some have the damnedest time coping with it. I am talking about terrible fathers.

I have a very diverse set of friends and a large family that spreads across the country. From entrepreneurs to 9 to 5 business folks, from pastors to people who can be considered evil, from the ever positive to the always angry and so on. The one thing that ties that group of people together is that they almost all have some sort of story where a father is not there or the father is in fact not a father to them or their family at all. The fact that this subject comes up so often in my travels as a documentary on life is disconcerting. Way too often is there a story about someone who has not heard from their father or their father is either mentally or physically abusive. As I’ve grown up the stories changed from people having issues with their father, to people having issues making the child’s father be a present and participating party. The consistency in something so damaging is staggering. Now don’t get me wrong, I do hear about the good fathers out there and I won’t say that it isn’t common. In fact the fathers doing what they are supposed to be doing aren’t what you hear about because you shouldn’t be credited or rewarded for doing what you are supposed to be doing. The stories that make their way to the top are the ones that have altered a person’s life and perception on men and what responsibility is. Or the ones that cause deep seeded trust and dependency issues. To watch a person go through life having this burden is like watching a fight video on World Star. You know at some point that it is going to be overwhelming and they will need to be picked up.

As a father myself, it is impossible for me to fathom the life of a man who created a child (or 12 if you’re Antonio Cromartie) and has no intent on them being a priority. I see myself in my kids and my history will not allow anything less than the best for my kids. The thought of never seeing the kids you made and living a happy life escape me as no explanation formed could justify such a thing outside of saving the world.

I really didn’t want this post to be a bashing of fathers. And this is definitely not a topic that needs awareness raised. I think I started this being in pain and since your heart and brain bleed through writing, this is what it has become. I wont go into my issues, but I will say that I am stronger because of it. I actually struggled with trying to write this as an unaffected 3rd party which only led to using backspace more often than actual typing. As I stated earlier, it is something that follows you through life no matter what type of wall you have put up to block out the affecting feelings. No matter the successes that life has brought. No matter the comfort given. And Fathers Day comes around 365 days a year. However since the calendar tells me that this Sunday is Fathers Day any father that feels as though they have been the subject of this blog should…..

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As I write this blog I am nearing the 24th hour of consciousness which probably shouldn’t happen for someone who has to have attention to detail at work. I will take this time to first say that I am making a commitment to my blog as I have had a lot of people who have given me positive feedback and I have not touched it in quite some time. The last time I wrote here it was about my issues sleeping. Well I can say that the issue is still evident and I am a shining example of consistency. I am up when I should be nearing time to wake up. Normally things on my mind never cause me to lose sleep, but tonight is different.

I have a mind that normally moves at the speed of a nervous virgin during his first time with a woman. I am fine with that as it is par for the course for a person that has no rhyme or reason for thinking about the things I think about. Normally I can parry the silliness and just force myself to sleep. Tonight for some reason, my head is a buzz saw of nonsense that I cannot slow enough to even purge from my cerebral stronghold. Any other night I would have a head filled with what can only be described as an acid trip while being water boarded by clowns on the set of a 70’s porn shoot while receiving a Dutch Rudder. Yes….I am fantastically weird and you now have a small glimpse into what makes me the person you all know and hopefully love. However that is not what is going through my head tonight. It seems as though the weird things I can handle with ease but when real dilemmas displace all other ‘regular’ thoughts I am incapable of sleeping until I have devised some sort of game plan to combat the intrusion of normality into my chaotic symphony of a brain.

I again am at the point of counting the time I will be able to sleep if I just immediately fell asleep right this second. Once that seal has been broken, the downward slide from being in bed to looking forward to work is a descent into hatred and raw frustration. I can already tell that the probability of me having a ‘Nigga Moment‘ at work is amazingly high as of right now due to my lack of patience when I am deprived of literally the easiest thing we as humans have to do which is sleep. As I slouch with the best of the worst posture and contemplate how I will make June 12th not be the day that my stellar 15 year streak of not losing my mind  comes to an end; I can only hope that the coffee is laced with Kool-Aid and Monster. Good night and thanks for reading. I will be making sure I keeps the blogs coming.